Karen’s says “You win some, you lose some”

losing it over 40 - you win some you lose some

I lost weight this week.  Mostly because I changed something.  I didn’t lose weight because I kept doing the same thing that was getting me fat, I didn’t lose weight because I “wished” hard enough to lose weight, I lost weight because I changed something.

I stopped putting half and half in my coffee.  I made the executive decision to continue to drink coffee (that was for your safety and for safety of the rest of humanity) but I did change how  I was drinking coffee.

That made a big difference.  BUT not the most important difference.

The MOST IMPORTANT difference is that it started making my brain work differently.  That one change helped me become aware of a whole series of automatic actions and habits that were supporting weight gain and not weight loss.  Amazingly they weren’t necessarily “intentional” thoughts.

In other words, I didn’t start to pick up a cookie and then admonish myself and put it down, I simply noticed that when I walked into the kitchen at work, that I was walking by the cookies on the table.  I noticed that when I saw a co-worker unwrapping a chocolate, they were just unwrapping a chocolate… they weren’t inviting me to join them.

I realized that seeing food, was not necessarily an invitation to eat it.  And I realized that I had been treating it like it was, AND more fantastically …  that one change I made to my morning coffee was enough to set my brain on a different path and that allowed me to notice this about myself.  As I write this, it’s hard to put it into words.  That day in the office didn’t feel like I was at a cross roads making a choice, between good and evil… between what I want and what I know would be better for me… it was more like an awareness.  Like I was a nonsmoker and they were offering me a cigarette.  I simply didn’t give it my attention.

And in the back of my mind, I realized that was different.  That wasn’t how I HAD BEEN thinking… and it was new.

MONDAY DAY: Office Lunch Day.  The boss buys lunch for everyone.  On this day it was pizza.  I didn’t eat the usual 2-3 slices of pizza… in fact, I didn’t eat any pizza.  I had brought my lunch of quinoa chips and creamy tomato soup and that’s what I ate.  I was happy to eat it, I didn’t miss the pizza.  The pizza didn’t fit into my idea of how I wanted to eat that day.

MONDAY DINNER : I went to 4 Knives and picked up dinner.  It’s my compromise, it was a fresh cooked meal, I just wasn’t the one cooking it.   We all got to eat what we wanted, and I didn’t need to cook it or clean up any dishes!  I had a veggie burger and french fries.  I’m not going to apologize, I’m just stating the facts.  It was delicious.  No regrets.  I was satisfied and I was full and as a bonus, no snacking later.

Tuesday morning weigh-in and I was still on track losing weight.

TUESDAY DAY : I stopped at the store on the way to work to “recreate the previous days success” and buy another bag of quinoa chips and container of creamy tomato soup. While I was there, I also purchased Lentil chips …. Supposedly for tomorrow.  Um… except, I didn’t save them for Wednesday, I ate them on Tuesday.  I realize now, after the fact, that I do that.  I convince myself to buy things using logical reasoning, but it’s just me convincing myself to buy something I probably don’t need… or at least not at that moment.

I LEARNED that if I have it, I’m more likely to eat it.  Maybe I could have left that second bag of chips in the car… but probably, I shouldn’t have bought them at all.

TUESDAY DINNER : I took the kids to a pizzeria, where they had Pizza and I had Eggplant Parmesan. My meal was delicious.  So good, that even though I thought… “I’m so full, I don’t need to finish this” I didn’t stop. It was so delicious.  I remember now (as I write this) even thinking, “I just can’t stop eating this.

I LEARNED that I suck at portion control. As soon as I saw the plate of food I should have asked for a To Go Container, and I should have split it in ½ right away.  I should have been telling myself, “This is so good, I can’t wait to have the second half for breakfast”  HA HA HA HA HA HA

You win some and you lose some

I’m not disappointed or ashamed, it’s all a learning process. I am literally trying to reprogram 52 years of thinking in order to change.  That means each challenge is an opportunity for me to put more tools in my toolbox.  It’s not going to happen overnight and it’s important to celebrate the WINS’s as much as recognizing the challenges.

You Win Some:  I learned 2 things about preparing for my day.

  1. I will reconsider being OVER-PREPARED. In other words, I will need to rethink “stock piling” food so I don’t have to go to the store to get what I need to feel prepared to stay on course.  I will look at the shopping like “me time.”  I will allow myself the time to get what I need to stay healthy even if that means going to the store every day instead of buying it all at once. BECAUSE I know the truth about myself: IF I HAVE IT AVAILABLE, I WILL PROBABLY EAT IT. (at least right now)
  2. I will set a different chain of events in motion when I go out for meals. Usually we eat until we are done, THEN ask for the “to-go container” In the future, as soon as the meal is served, I will thank the server, and ask for a to go container immediately, that way when it is provided I can divide my entree and set half aside.

You Lose Some: I lost 3 pounds this week.  Only 57 more to go!  I am SOOOO excited to make this a reality

What are some of your challenges?  Comment below

 

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